amen

I hate dating.

either its a formal, meet, exchange numbers, and meet again at a designated time and place wherein there is a few hours of awkward conversation followed by an ungodly long goodbye in which either a hug, kiss on the cheek, or kiss takes place, followed by a week of staring at your phone wondering if the anxiety is worth it.

or there is the run into eachother, hang out from that point (usually involving beer) and find an excuse to go to one or the other's house and have sex, followed by the awkward morning after ritual of "so was that a one night stand or am I actually going to hear from this person again?" followed by a week of staring at your phone wondering if the anxiety is worth it.

With the first, you don't end up feeling like a hussy, but with the second you get some action out of the deal, making it fairly redeemable if you never hear from the person again.

regardless, masturbation is clearly the better choice.